You Can Choose The Why, But You Can't Always Choose The How.
We finish high school and then it hits you in the face.. what do I want to do for the rest of my life and how am I going to make that happen? … We start university, switch our majors 3 or 4 times and then we choose our path. When I finished high school, I knew 2 things: I liked business, and I wanted to travel the world. The “how” I assumed for myself was go to university, after I would probably work for a company, who would send me all over the world for business trips, after 4 or 5 years of working there. It seemed like a long journey ahead, but I had a dream, and I knew his would be a way of making it happen.
Fun fact about me, I am a very spiritual being, and all the while I had been praying for an opportunity. I assumed that getting accepted to BYU was my opportunity, after that getting accepted to the University of Kent in England studying International Business was my opportunity, after that, dropping out entirely and becoming a content creator was my passion and opportunity. If you would have asked me straight out of high school that taking photos would fund my life, I would have laughed in your face! It didn’t happen all at once and in fact I still work everyday to make my dreams finally come to life. Through this journey over the last 5 years, there have been many highs, lows, tears, laughs, and then only this week there was a silent moment of, it’s finally starting to come together.
We all have dreams. We all have things that we want to be doing, passion projects that we are just waiting to turn into our dream jobs, but that is the thing… we keep waiting because we don’t know if it will work out. Let me tell you the best kept secret, you are worthy of your dreams. You are capable of making them happen, you can have your cake and it it too. The sad thing is, the probing question of “But How?” discourages so many people. From my experience I have learned a really valuable lesson:
You can choose the why, but you don’t always get to choose the how.
Make a Change:
Nothing will ever change in your life if you don’t. You will never be closer to the things you want if you keep doing the same things. If you want things to be different you need to decide for yourself how you are going to make them different! Be thinking of ways you want your life to change and you will see the first step to change your life.
Take the first step:
“You may not see the whole path but you can always see the first step.” This is the quote that I have been holding onto for dear life. I am a planner! I love to know how to get from A to B to Z, but sometimes that is just not the case. It’s overwhelming to think.. “Okay I am a school teacher, but also I want to be making 1 Million dollars every year…” I can already guess the question in your head.. How?! … Now let me answer it.. Stop worrying about it! If you are ready to take that dream on, if you want to make x amount of money, if you want to be a stay at home single mom, if you want to travel the world, you can. You just need to stop worrying about the how and take the first step. Let me be extremely honest with you.. I have NO idea what I’m doing 90% of the time, but I do know what the next step is and I hope and pray that it works out. Sometimes it works out, and sometimes I spend the evening in the bath with chocolate, a movie, and a little self pity, while I try to figure out what else to do. You have to be brave enough to take that first step, regardless of the outcome, then the next one, and the next. You may not know where the path is headed, but you do know where it leads.
Take the shot, take the chance, take the opportunity:
The funniest thing about humans is we BEG the universe for an opportunity and then when one shows up we think.. “No that’s not it, that can’t be it!” Sometimes you have no idea where an opportunity will lead. Be open to the idea that your opportunity, your chance, and your shot, may look differently or cost more money than you had originally envisioned for yourself.
Sometimes the “Opportunity” wasn’t YOUR opportunity:
Okay story time and I can not believe I am sharing this to the general public… I tried out for the Bachelor… When I was really wanting to become a content creator, I thought grand scale and said great. Anyone who gets on the bachelor gets popular instantly and that would be wonderful for my personal business. No, don’t worry you didn’t miss my season and big debut on the bachelor, because I never made it! I was actually extremely convinced though that this would be my ticket to success and a little bummed to be honest, when I didn’t get on the show! I thought this would be “IT” for me and when it wasn’t, the “Now What” syndrome set in. If you haven’t had the “Now What Syndrome” it looks like this… You get fired from your job or you work really hard on a project and your child colors with crayons all over it, you didn’t get into your dream University, you just closed the chapter on a relationship, or on the “Safe, Sure, Game Plan”. Which is then followed by, “I’ve just wasted my time.”
There is a story that I love that addresses this. It talks about a son and a dad. They were on their way home and were trying to navigate through the dark when they came to a fork in the road, they both felt impressed to go to the left. They got about 30 minutes down that path when the road ended. They were so confused at the error and made their way back to the main road. As they were on their way back, they discovered a very valuable lesson, “Because we were prompted to take the road to the left, we quickly discovered which one was the right one. When we turned around and got on the right road, I was able to travel along its many unfamiliar twists and turnoffs perfectly confident I was headed in the right direction.”
Remember this, your time and maybe even your money was not wasted. You can now be sure that “that path” was not the one for you. You never know the impact you made on someone down that path, and you never know the impact that someone had on you. The lessons you learned from the “wrong” opportunity may have better prepared you for the right one!
Everything is an opportunity if you make it one:
Sometimes our plans for ourselves are not the ones that end up sticking and we need to look at the events in our lives as a “new way”. We need to keep in mind that there are a million ways to make our dreams happen. There are millions of opportunities every day! Create them and take them! If you work from home and you want to make more friends, study in the library, work in a coffee shop and say hello to the person next to you. Who know the connections you can make. Who knows the opportunities someone can provide for you and the opportunities that you can provide for someone else. Be searching for a new way to look at your “how” and because you are searching for them, more and more will come up in your life.
Surround yourself with people who are pushing you:
Sometimes this path to your dreams is a discouraging one. Sometimes things seem to not be working out and you don’t know what you are doing, but keep in mind that you do not have to walk this path alone. Surround yourself with people who can talk you out of the self doubt and the ones who are continually inspiring you. That’s why we created the Boss Babes Mastermind. The idea behind this whole Mastermind is that, you can have anything you want, with the right resources and the right connections. If you are needing an opportunity to really make your dreams happen, join this community! We are all in a committed relationship with making our dreams happen. Our well connected community is designed to give you the support and help that you may need! If you have been begging for an opportunity this could be it. Read more Here
I firmly believe that you can create any life that you want to live. As you continue in the direction of your dreams, the “how” won’t matter. Trust that you are worthy of your dream life and do everything you can to make it happen. If I can help in any way, if I can create opportunities for you, please please reach out to me! In the meantime, subscribe to my blog to get A Little Piece of Bri Elise weekly